Spotted this when flicking through the cable listings:
I could have made that documentary, and I bet my version would have been better. It would have consisted of the opening title, on black, followed by a second title card that read "No. For fuck's sake." Short, accurate, to the point.
Check out boycottmcdonalds.com, a treasure trove of stupidity, illiteracy and, er, McMuffins. The comments are all kinds of dumb. There's mathematical genius:
"3 kids 2 adults will now go to a competitor. If we all do this, the numbers will add up."*
Moral relativism:
"No Big Mac is worth the moral compromise of agreeing with the homosexual agenda."
(Note: in fact, the homosexual agenda equals one Extra Value Meal, or to put it another way four hamburgers and a strawberry milkshake). A plea from one hungry family:
"We have purchased our last happy meal for my family of 6"
The world's least effective boycott:
"I work for McDonald's as a manager. I am forced to boycott your chain because of this action you have chosen to take. This will be your loss nationwide."
A tearjerker:
"I will have to kiss those sausage mcmuffins goodbye. Your reponsibility lies not with gays but with the American people that helped build this empire. You have lost your integrity."
And then the nadir:
"YOU DID NOT BILD YOUR COMPANY ON HOMOSEXUAL PEOPLE! IT WAS BUILD ON FAMILY VALUES! MAN,WIFE.CHILDREN!MOSTLTY CHILDREN! THEY DON'T COME FROM HOMO PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I tried to build a restaurant chain on homosexual people once. It didn't work, because making the restaurants small enough to be worn as a hat meant that nobody could fit inside to work or eat there. It didn't turn out any better when I repeated the exercise using straight people, though. Next time I'll just buy some land like anyone else.
* Bonus prize to anyone who can work out how many they will add up to.
For a brief period I worked in a company of Independent Financial Advisers. I didn't learn much about finance, really, but I did pick up a few things. Such as, for example: when looking for currency trading service, don't pick one that
a) Advertises on Facebook
b) Puts "Sterling" after the word "the". Or before "is pounding", for that matter. Or,
c) Illustrates Sterling with the symbol for Yen
Key facts: I will be charging for this advice on a commission basis, so you now owe me exactly two percent of any money made by following it. The value of this advice may go up or down. Past performance is not a guarantee of future etc etc.