Government press release, this morning:

Branded high-visibility jackets must be worn by offenders carrying out work on community payback projects from today as part of a Government drive to ensure the public can see punishment being carried out in the community.

Next week's headline: construction worker stoned to death by angry, confused, stupid mob. From the notes:

79% of the public believe that the Criminal Justice System respect the rights of offenders and only 33% believe that it meets the needs of victims.

Great. Let's find the other 67% and see if they've got some ideas on what to do about crime. Crucifiction, maybe. In high-visibility jackets. And since we're doing statistics, the Criminal Justice System should really be written as singular 100% of the time.

Also, we've been compiling a list of words used only in The Sun. So far: plucky (Brits), romp, bonk, steamy, love rat, tot (tragic), stunner. Any more?

.. but if you get a chance, check out the hilariously crap computer generated graphic that appears in The Sun today – it's supposed to illustrate a jailhouse shooting, but instead it looks like the victim is about to burst into the showstopping final number of a musical theatre production about mannequins. Online here.